Ok, so you’re getting married! First up, Congrats!  We LURVE weddings! Anyways, you have got everything planned (or at least pencilled in) from the Dress, The Celebrant, The Perfect Venue, The Photographer, The Cake, The Flowers and The Perfect Wedding Band.  You want everything to be bang on for your special day but you have been to a few weddings in the past right?  Because you are fastidious, you take notice of all the little details and you have learned from other’s shortfalls.  You know what makes you and your partner unique and by the power of all things sparkly you want a full dance floor!

Well, as experts in “the biz” and we know that nothing shuts down a dance floor faster than a few choice tunes that are overplayed or outright offensive.  We’re all for creativity and keeping the biggest celebration of your life a memorable experience but obnoxiously inappropriate songs can lead to an empty dance floor. FACT.

Some things to consider when picking the song list that defines you –

Is it truly a love song? It may have a nice melody and feature heavily the word “love”…….but is this a wolf in sheep’s clothing? Does this major key melody harbour a dirty little secret?

Will it upset your Nan? If you wouldn’t use that language at Christmas lunch, don’t inadvertently F Bomb your Gran through the gift of music.

Does the song have matching dance moves that you would have learned for primary school music class:

Did a DJ play it at a school dance with a matching Nightlife Video?

 

 

Does it require a basic knowledge of a language other than English (Spanish) and a significant wingspan that isn’t supported in semi formal wear?

Is it a Grease Mega Mix? Probably leave it alone… Just to avoid a universal groan from the collective guest list or a blowout of your bar tab.

It is wise to discuss the song list with your band or DJ well in advance. If you have a list of 100 songs that must be played however, take note- your band will probably not have time to learn all of them.  They will for sure pick a few that they know will slay the DF (*dance floor). Trust your choice in band.  They have done this before. They got this.

Buuuuut, if there are some definite “Do Not Play Under ANY Circumstances” songs on your list, absolutely let them know!  They want you to have a great day regardless of whether the song was the most popular love tune of all time.  It may be triggery for you.  We get it.  Not a problem at all.

(Note, this list is just a suggestion.  We’re saying if your 2nd Cousin proposed to his 3rd wife at a Yeezy Concert and Gold Digger is the song your Grandad knows word for word then who are we to tell you what to do!?! Go forth with our blessing. “WE WANT PRENUP!! WE WANT PREEENUP!!!”)

Without further ado here is our TOP 16 songs to avoid at weddings—-

  1. YMCA- Village People : Dance moves that no one wants to be forced to do… It is super hard with a Bardot style off the shoulder dress too babes…trust me.
  2. Macarena- : See above.
  3. Nutbush – Tina Turner: See above. Primary School PTSD is a thing…trust me.
  4. It wasn’t me – Shaggy: If it wasn’t then who was it Shaggy? Hmm? WHO??
  5. Anything by Pink, Taylor Swift, Adele- Scorned lover soundtracks and empowered women on the aftermath of breakup in the sweet revenge category of song writing does not make for happily ever after ear candy.
  6. Forget you/F*You –Cee lo: Both versions are a real bummer.  Also, haven’t we moved on from this yet? The song is 8 years old.  It was probably a breakup anthem from a previous relationship in 2010.  If not yours, then definitely someone else’s.
  7. Tears in Heaven- Eric Clapton: I don’t know if this needs much of an explanation but if Eric himself doesn’t play it anymore, then maybe don’t ask your band or DJ to play it either unless you want tears at your #grazingtable.
  8. Highway to Hell- AC/DC:  May be funny for a garter toss…may also be seen as offensive. Up to your discretion.  Or as my Mum used to say “If in doubt, leave it out.”
  9. Am I Ever Gonna See your Face Again- the Angels : Not only does this 1980s aussie rock classic feature heavily a crowd-penned expletive chant during the chorus but the entire song is about death.  Specifically, it was inspired by some friend of Doc Neeson who’s girlfriend died in a motorbike accident.  Not such a chipper choice of songs for your nuptials…
  10. Gold Digger – Kanye West: Swears, “N” words not to mention the main theme… everything about this track screams wedding playlist warning bells.  Not for the faint hearted.
  11. The Thong Song- Sisqo:  No. Place. At. A. Wedding.  However, Gran sure as heck wont know what a “thong” is in relation to this song.  She will most likely innocently assume it’s about casual summer sandals.
  12. More than Words – Extreme: Extreme Dance floor killer.  Also, this song is a passive aggressive dig about not getting any…
  13. Ho Hey- The Lumineers: This may sound like an upbeat love song, but it is really about someone you love being with someone else. Speak now or for-HoHey-ever hold your peace.
  14. Marry You- Bruno Mars: Not as innocent as it seems.  “If we wake up and you wanna break up that’s cool/ No I wont blame you/ it was fun girl.”  Kinda downplays the importance of the day…In fact, Bruno is just implying that he’s bored and wants to be impulsive.  Not that he reaaally wants to get married.
  15. Follow Me- Uncle Kracker: The song that takes you back to the summer of 2001 is in reality about cheating.  Mind Blown!  Also, maybe drugs…Mind DOUBLE BLOWN! “I’m not worried about the ring you wear/ ‘cause as long as no one knows/ then nobody can care.”

Congratulations from all of us here at Superband.  If you are #blessed enough to get as far as booking a band for you and your soul mate’s biggest bash EVER, we hope that we have given you a little clarity when it comes to picking a party playlist that’s sure to be the best your loved ones have ever boogied to!

Wishing you a happy ever after.

Love,

Superband